Monday, October 4

Offender

I never realized what a horrible implication it was for Theo’s poor friend Cockroach to be nicknamed as such on the Cosby Show.. until I had cockroaches in my living room.

The Boy and I lived in some high density cockroach breeding areas in Manhattan for quite a long time, with nary a roach to be seen in the living room, so we never anticipated that moving to LA would bring us this kind of present.

Upon arrival at our charming new 1930s-era apartment in a Tudor house of Los Angeles, though, our thoughts proved wrong.

Two months and two days ago we walked into the apartment, mystified, having forgotten our tour and how spacious and appealing the place actually was. For a change, we’d have SIX full rooms to call our own. The place has a generously sized master bedroom, a second that we use for an office, a bathroom, a kitchen (with enough space for an actual table and two whole chairs), get ready for this: a DINING ROOM, and a full sized living room.

Needless to say, we were head over heals, jumping up and down and high-fiving as if we’d won some multi-million dollar sweepstakes. We were this excited even after finding out about our moving truck.

After our stuff arrived, and we’d been all set up for about a week, it happened. I walked into our living room, and spotted the roach standing obstinate near the corner, behind my favorite chair, with its disgusting antennae darting back and forth. Now, I was looking at it from behind, but still felt like it was watching me. Recalling myriad roach horror stories, images of millions of them behind my walls popped into my head, and I screamed for The Boy to get rid of it, please.

There were seven other occurrences, the last of which involved picking up one of the offenders in a cup, opening the front door to throw it out, and having two more offenders fall from above. ICK.

Thankfully, we have excellent landlords who live right above us, and because they don’t want offenders in their living room any more than we do, we had an exterminator the day after the falling incident. Meanwhile, The Boy and I Googled offenders for about three hours and learned all the wonderful things about them. We have these.

Since all of this, we've learned that the neighborhood has what the landlords and the exterminator call an unfixably bad roach problem (they’re all in the sewers). The exterminator said that now they’re “just getting lost” and coming into the house. I don’t know. I haven’t seen a roach since he sprayed outside, and I’m hoping he was completely, infallibly right.

Can you believe this? (What type of person spend money to help them reproduce?!)


2 Comments:

Blogger Eric Grumbles said...

I can totally sympathize. When I lived in Georgia (near Savannah) we got really BIG cockroaches. I mean like the size of a VW! Anyhow, one night my wife wakes me up and tells me she hears something in the bathroom. So I go look and don't see anything, come back and go back to sleep. At the time I'm in the military so I have to get up at 5:00 to get to work on time and it's about 3:15. She wakes me up again a couple of minutes later. The noise in the bathroom. This goes on a couple more times. Finally I decide to look up when I go check "the noise".

There they are, cockroaches, trying to get out of the fan vent, all I can see is their ugly antennae. I grabbed some saran wrap and duct tape and sealed the fan vent and went back to sleep. We called the exterminator in the morning because Raid didn't phase these guys. Good luck!

Thanks for the link.

October 4, 2004 at 9:34 PM  
Blogger JEA said...

Quick thinker at 3:15. I'll keep the saran in mind. (we have lots of large vents.)

My aunt lived in Savannah for a long time before moving to Fort Worth, and she says the roaches in both states are comparable in their hugeness.

I'm just glad that ours were no longer than my smallest finger.

October 5, 2004 at 2:04 PM  

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